Two Decisions

I did not go to Baguio.

Last night we are talking about the trip's logistics. And it dawns on me as I make my 8175th trip to the bathroom for that day, it's quite a possibly that I may be uncomfortable because I'll be in an area I've never been with food prepared in unknown areas with extended periods of time with no bathroom access and staying with people I don't know.

All of this spelled out very clearly: LISA: STOP GAMBLING WITH YOUR EXISTENCE.

Mhm. I still had to think about it.

Kim, who was ready to lasso me onto the bus, is convincing me to shoot up enough Immodium to plug me up for the next 5 months. As appealing as THAT sounded, I told the group leaders that I just don't think it was going to work out for me during this trip. I felt like I was at a crossroads. Baguio is GORGEOUS, full of mountains, rice fields, and COOL (talking temps here). That oh-so-attractive combination made it difficult to make my decision. As the accommodations were explained: sleeping on mats on floors and meandering about in mining fields with no access to bathrooms, my stomach began turning and I had to go to the bathroom again.

While the group was, literally, leaving, I call Nick to double check my decision. Our conversation went something like this:

ME: Sorry - do you have a quick second?
N: Yeah - what's up?
ME: I don't think I'm going to Baguio because there is no bathroom on the bus, the trip is going to be about 6-7 hours, we maybe sleeping on a floor with a mat. I'll be walking around a mining community with no bathroom and staying with families who may cook me something I can't eat and will feel bad if I don't eat it and will end up eating it and then my stomach will surely hate me and then I'll collapse again into a heap, this time the garbage mountain will be optional.

N: Do you realize anything about yourself?
SILENCE
N: You get sick when you are stressed and do not sleep well. You need to sleep and get well and RELAX. This trip is the exact opposite.

ME: You always know exactly what to say.
N: Well, it's not hard when it's kind of obvious that you're not well and you keep pushing yourself to do things you're not well enough to do.
ME: You're right. I feel better about my decision. I was just wondering if this is one of those times you're supposed to suck it up and go for it. Like, this is a once in a lifetime trip, you know?
N: Right, but you'll be miserable the whole time. What are you going to do if your stomach starts feeling like needles again? Die?
ME: Well, the last time I pushed myself I lost my vision and hearing, so I think I'll play it safe this time.
N: Good choice.
ME: Agreed.

See why we make such a great team?

So that was decision one.

The other decision was to use this blog as my daily writings of my day, to document what I am doing. I have numerous journals and writing spots, but it's getting to be too much and I'm losing days when I'm not writing. So, this blog is my designated documentation spot and more writing here means it will really be a lot of more casual in style and a bit more random. Posts will be less organized because frequency will be increasing. Just FYI.

Hope your weekends are as good as mine :)